Does it have to be you?

Breathe in. Breathe out. Letting the eucalyptus steam hit me, allowing the stress and sweat to seep out of my pores… my eyes adjusting to the dim lighting and the thick fog, the streak of cool neon blue tracing the outline of the ceiling.

There was no one else in the Aromatic Steam Room with me… the heat and steam kept most people at bay, preferring to go with the sanarium [a cooler version of a sauna with less humidity] or the traditional sauna instead.

I started to tap my right fingers against the fleshy part of the outside of my left hand, gearing up for a session of the Emotional Freedom Technique (aka tapping)… a tapping session to address my hatred of thoughtless people. 

People bumping into me at the buffet line… people entering the elevator without waiting for people to exit it first…. children swimming in the adults-only pool….. people using their outdoor voices in the Thermal Suite, with its large signs stating “QUIET ZONE” in several places…..

That last one was the reason why I was currently tapping in the steam room. I was furious. I’d spent so much money for an unlimited pass for me and hubby so that we could go and relax, letting the water jets hit our tired backs, legs, and feet after walking around different ports of call on excursion days… a quiet place with spa amenities where we could unwind….

…Only to be faced with people in the hot tub of the quiet area having conversations at the top of their lungs to be heard over the water jets, surfing on their cell phones, and having beers!

Why do that here? I thought to myself. Wouldn’t the hot tubs up on deck be more suited for social hour? Aren’t you worried about dropping your precious phone into the bubbling water?

I tried to ignore it at first. I lay out on the heated recliners and closed my eyes, willing myself to not hear the loud conversations going on behind me. I opened my eyes and looked out on the waves and the horizon, noting the cloud patterns and weather we were sailing into, the land formations we were passing. 

Serenity now, I thought as I willed it to be silent. No dice.

Back in the steam room, I tapped on the karate chop point frantically, as I spoke my setup statements:

“Even though I’m so pissed off that loudmouths are ruining this space for relaxation, I still love, accept, and forgive myself…. [deep breath]

Even though I realize that they are on vacation, I’m on vacation too and my vacation matters and I still love, accept, and forgive myself… [deep breath]

Even though I’m foaming mad at this intrusion into this quiet space that I worked so hard to pay for and looked forward to for months, I love, accept, and forgive myself…”

Then I began to “power tap” through the points, starting with the crown of my head, using the first two fingers of both hands, while venting out loud. I don’t remember the words that came out of my mouth, but they were along the lines of “I am so freaking pissed off, I’m fucking mad, this is ruining my vacation…,” etc.

But the more I tapped and spoke aloud, the more the feelings began to shift and change, my attitude becoming more positive with every moment. Thoughts bubbled to the surface that someone should tell those people off. Yes. That’s what should happen. Someone should give them a good talking to.

And then a small still voice welled up inside of me…. with this calm question: 

Does it have to be you?

I knew that voice. Knew that voice well. It wasn’t me. It was the goddess Brigid, quietly and assertively stating facts… it wasn’t even a question. It was more like, Hey, Hilary… it doesn’t always have to be you righting the wrongs, fighting the fights.

I stopped mid-tap and started listening. She continued: someone WILL tell them off. But it doesn’t have to be you. In fact, it shouldn’t be you. Stay out of it.

With those few simple statements, I released my righteous rage… it went out of me in a rush. I continued to tap, speaking aloud acknowledgments that the other people in the Thermal Suite has paid their way too, and were also on vacation.

I conveyed gratitude to my goddess for once again teaching me a lesson in boundaries and forgiveness, anger and acceptance.

When I exited the steam room, I felt a weight lift along with the sweat evaporating from my skin.

It wasn’t a permanent solution… I continued to experience frustration with my fellow cruisers. But every time I felt that frustration bubble up, I knew what to do. I excused myself and tapped on it, or quietly put my hands underneath the table and tapped on the karate chop point and thought the words that I would otherwise be saying aloud if alone (it still works just as well, I promise).

And with a lightened heart, I was able to enjoy my vacation and the rest of the cruise much more fully.

~*~Hilary~*~

P.S.—Want more info about EFT (tapping)? Watch Gala Darling’s newest High Vibe Honey video as she walks you through tapping in affirmations every week. To learn more about the setup statement and tapping points, check out Jessica Ortner’s video from the Tapping Solution. Notice the differences in the tapping sequences and choose whatever version you like best.

P.P.S.—Want a soothing playlist for tarot readings, meditation, or just nice instrumental background music? I’ve created one right here.

Blessings,
~*~Hilary~*~
www.tarotbyhilary.com
hilary@tarotbyhilary.com

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HILARY PARRY HAGGERTY is a tarot reader, witch, mentor, editor, and teacher. She has been reading tarot for over 21 years (13 years professionally). She was the winner of Theresa Reed’s (The Tarot Lady) Tarot Apprentice contest in 2011, and has taught classes on tarot and spell-work at The Tarot School’s annual tarot conference Readers Studio and at Brid’s Closet Beltane Festival. She writes a weekly blog on tarot at her website www.tarotbyhilary.com and has been featured in Maxim Magazine and BuzzFeed.

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© Hilary Parry Haggerty | Tarot by Hilary